Lord of the Dumb Ass Ring

2007 was a really crap year for movies. Apart from '300' and 'The Transformers Movie', the rest were somewhat forgettable and did not live up to expectation. Even with the plethora of pirated DVDs on offer here, I find myself uninspired to purchase new movies, even at these rediculously low prices. So, in my boredom, I recently completed watching the entire Lord of the Rings Trilogy. Over 3 days mind you, I'm not crazy enough to watch it back to back, that is a 10 hour ordeal! Now this brings me to my post.

After watching it again, I have one question. Why the hell didn't Gandalf the all knowing git, simply get the damn giant Eagles to fly Frodo to the mountain of Mordor to begin with? Or for that matter, fly HIMSELF to the mountain! I see no reason to drag these four borderline-gay-Hobbits through hell and back, when all Gandalf had to do was to carry the Ring himself to mountain and destroy it. In 'The Two Towers' Gandalf had the power to summon the Eagles to his rescue (via the help from a Butterfly don't forget). So he could have easily called for them at the meeting of the Fellowship at the start of the first movie. Total time? One hour at the most, Sauron and his massive army..... dead. Problem solved.

If you argue that Gandalf would not be able to withstand the Ring's evil pull, I say, he sure didn't have a problem with the Saruman magic-eye-orb thing that he simply covered with a towel. In any case don't tell me he can't resist the Ring for one hour of flying time? He doesn't have to wear it round his neck.. just wrap it up in his towel. Done.

If you argue that the evil flying Nazgol will stop the Eagles, I say, it was the Eagles that came to the rescue to kill them at the end of 'Return of the King'. Moreover, with Gandalf riding the Eagle, his magic staff would emit that blinding light that the Nazgol is afraid off (as seen in 'Return of the King' also). So fly in, drop ring in lava, go home and celebrate.

Instead, 10 hours of movie, Frodo almost killing himself, Golumn the nut, mountains, trolls, massive battles, and lets not forget the fact that it took Frodo and pals 12 months to go and come home. Poor bastards.

I'm only writing as I feel kind of cheated in a way, because even the author, after all the hardship indured to destroy the ring, J.R.R Tolkien then simply wrote, "...and Gandalf rescued Frodo and Sam from the mountain with the help of the Eagles", which to me, was him being fed-up and just wanted to wrap up his book after writing pages and pages of shit.