Thursday, January 24, 2008

Can you read this?

fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe can. i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty esdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

Monday, January 14, 2008

Why I Fired My Secretary

This kind of story reminds us to never take what we have in life, for granted..


Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up
on that morning.

I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,"Happy Birthday!", and possibly have a small
present for me..

As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "Happy Birthday."

I thought...

Well, that's marriage for you,

but the kids...

They will remember.

My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent..

As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said,"Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday ! "
It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.

I worked until one o'clock ,when Jane knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me."
I said, "Thanks, Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day.
Let's go !"

We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go.
She chose instead at a quiet bistro with a private table.
We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office, Jane said, "You know, It's such a beautiful day...

We don't need to go straight back to the office, do we ?"
I responded,"I guess not.What do you have in mind ?"
She said,"Let's drop by my apartment,it's just around the corner."

After arriving at her apartment,Jane turned to me and said,"
Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment.
I'll be right back." "Ok." I nervously replied.

She went into the bedroom and,after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake ...

Followed by my wife,my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing "Happy Birthday".

And I just sat there...

On the couch...

Naked.

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Babe for 2008 - Gemma Atkinson

Well it has been over a week into 2008, and all is well, so far. I think its time I give my prediction for the next 'it' girl for 2008. The next model, come actress, come celebrity, that I think will break out of England make it big in Hollywood. What do they feed their women in the U.K? They must be doing something right. I think it might be the fish 'n chips or Donner kebabs. I don't know what it is about British women that makes me go oh so mental. Is it the accent? Is it the healthy bodies? Is it the smell? Is it the heaving breasts coupled with a slender waist and meaty thighs? Or maybe its all of the above, combined? Yes definitely.

You only need Google names like Zeta Jones, Rhona Mitra, Kate Beckinsale, Keeley Hazell, Lucy Pinder, Kelly Brook, the list goes on and on. All smoking hot women. All from England. In 2006, I made a top ten list and listed unknown Michelle Ryan to be big in 2007. Sure enough, she was casted as the new Bionic Woman and she will also to star in several upcoming Hollywood movies.

And so, my pick for 2008 is Gemma Atkinson. Oh yes, Gemma.... sexy, sweet, wondrous, lovely, bold, exciting, Gemma. Born 16 November 1984 in Bury, Greater Manchester. Gemma is an actress, television personality and glamour & lingerie model. Oh and did I mention lingerie model? Bra's are her specialty if you have to ask. In early 2006, Atkinson underwent breast enlargement surgery, which took her bra size to a 34D. (Yay!!). She said in an interview that she lost weight due to a fitness regime and her bust size declined. (boo!). The surgery then gave them the original shape they once were. (yay! again!). Since launching her parallel career as a glamour model, Atkinson has appeared in provocative photoshoots in lingerie and swimwear, including non-nude topless shots, for men's magazines such as Arena, FHM, Loaded, Maxim, Zoo Weekly and Nuts. In October 2006, she appeared in three of the aforementioned magazines in one month, becoming one of the most prolific celebrity glamour models in the UK. In November 2006, it was announced by Zoo Weekly that Atkinson had agreed to lend her name to their regular "sex and relationships column".

In May 2007, Atkinson was announced as the "glamorous new face" of the British Grand Prix and the official "mascot" of the "hi-octane" championship at Silverstone on July 8. She was the face of the 2007 Tour de France. She has most recently been seen as the new face of the Lingerie chain La Senza, but recently has been replaced by Czech Supermodel Petra Nemcova. Her 2008 calendar was shot in Thailand, and was released on November 1st 2007. Gemma has stated she is proud of the more natural look of this calendar, as opposed to the glamorously stylised look of the 2007 product. In October 2007, Atkinson was elected the new face of Ultimo's D-G range. Atkinson features in the ITV reality series I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here! which began in the UK on November 12, 2007. She became the 7th celebrity to be evicted from the jungle - which she appeared very pleased about.

I sure hope she makes it, and if she doesn't, she should continue to model as I will be extremely sad and flaccid if she quits. So good luck to you Gemma for 2008... just know, you can runaway to sunny Malaysia if no one wants you. Which is of course, is unlikely. Heh.
So look out for her people... I know I will.....

Tears of joy will stream down your face if you stare too long at her pictures.

I think I read somewhere that doctors recommend staring at breasts for few minutes at the start of everyday. Apparently as it helps moderate blood pressure. That sounds about right...

 Does anyone still use this???   Seriously.....