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Showing posts from April, 2008

An ode to the Fart

A fart it is a pleasant thing,
It gives the belly ease,
It warms the bed in winter,
And suffocates the fleas.
.
A fart can be quiet,
A fart can be loud,
Some leave a powerful,
Poisonous cloud
.
A fart can be short,
Or a fart can be long,
Some farts have been known
To sound like a song......
.
A fart can create
A most curious medley,
A fart can be harmless,
Or silent , and deadly.
.
A fart might not smell,
While others are vile,
A fart may pass quickly,
Or linger a while......
.
A fart can occur
In a number of places,
And leave everyone there,
With strange looks on their faces.
.
From wide-open prairie,
To small elevators,
A fart will find all of
Us sooner or later.
.
But farts are all bad,
Is simply not true-
We must never forget.......
Sweet old farts like you!
Kinda brings a tear to your eye don't it?

Why first-born children are brighter than their siblings

I found this interesting article from the Daily Mail in the U.K (link)
So siblings, don't get mad.... its just an article.. I mean who am I to argue with scientific fact?
First-born children are more intelligent than their siblings, research has found.The oldest child is more likely to have a higher IQ, and the youngest likely to have the lowest, say researchers. Scientists at Vrije University, Amsterdam, studied 650 children whose IQs were tested three times until they were 18. Dorret Boomsma, whose work will be published in the journal Intelligence, said: "The effect is seen in boys and girls. "The highest IQ scores were in children without any older siblings, followed by children with one older sibling. "Children with two or more older siblings obtained the lowest score." Why this occurs is unclear but it is thought that the level of attention parents lavish on first-borns boosts their intellectual development. But while the oldest may be the brightest, a…

Cut the crap, who cares?

I just want to say that I have been totally uninspired to write anything. Lately, nothing has made me mad enough or happy enough to write anything of importance. I honestly wonder if anyone still reads this blog... let alone care. Monkey balls.

A poem comes to mind. A composition of mindless and silly bunch of words I can string together.


Blogging, Blogging,
Smoggling, Smoggling,
Oh what a waste of time this is,
I wish I were a shoe.

Typing, Typing,
Sleeping, Slapping,
Oh look how the rain drops gloom this day,
I wish I were a zit.

How deep is you love?
How deep is your anus?
How shallow are armpits?
How shallow are the puddles of pee in the school yard?

Crapping, Crapping,
Shitting, Slapping,
Oh how the crap is never round,
I wish I were a toilet brush.

Stab me, poke me,
Wake me, Slap me,
I feel the future near,
I fear the future here,
I wish I were a million bucks.

And thats about it...
Untill I get inspired next.
Untill I get my ass in check.


I'm out.